Dear Kate,
A very close friend of mine treats his cat meanly and it’s really starting to worry me. He always talks badly to him and doesn’t seem to realize that, as a kitten, he’s going to be ornery for a while. He scolds, yells, and outright spanks the cat for normal kitten behavior. I’ve tried to talk to him about this, but he gets angry and tells me I shouldn’t tell him how he should treat his cat. It really bothers me to see him treating his kitten like this. He plans on getting the cat declawed soon rather than take the time to teach the cat to use a scratching post and not his couch. When I ask him why, his response is always somewhere along the lines of, “I shouldn’t have to deal with this!”
How do I address this issue with my friend without damaging our friendship?
Sincerely,
Katie-Cat
Dear Katie-Cat,
This is a really tough one and I applaud you for not clawing your friend’s eyes out yet for this kind of behavior. Almost every writer on the Kate-Book team is a cat owner/lover, so I think I can vouch for us all when I say this guy sounds like a jerk.
People can get very testy when it comes to being told how to treat their pets (or their children) but sometimes it is so tough to just sit back and watch someone seemingly abuse their pet when you know that there is a better and more productive way of training the little critter.
Firstly, I would open the conversation in a non-accusatory way by saying Continue reading






