Okay … so I get this link the other day:
The headline reads: “Meet Dear Kate”
I think: “FINALLY. Someone cares! People are reading my column! This is it! See ya later, day job! I am OFFICIALLY a famous writer and things are going up Up UP!”
Subheading: “Brilliant Underwear That’s High-Tech, Not High-Maintenance”
“Underwear?” I think. “But I didn’t just write any columns about underwear. Wait…wait a second. Noooooooo.”
This column isn’t abut me it’s about UNDERWEAR! Underwear? Underwear.
Oh but the buck doesn’t stop there, oh nooooo my friends. This isn’t just any underwear…this is high-tech, leak-resistant fabric for woman who occasionally PEE IN THEIR PANTIES.
List of things to be upset about:
- Not a famous writer.
- “Dear Kate” are pee-panties.
- Do I need to change my identity?
- Again, “Dear Kate” = pee-pee panties.
- Still not a famous writer.
- Have to keep my day job.
So I kept reading the article anyway, and I actually kind of liked what I saw. (Darn it!)
First of all, these sound really smart for athletes and expectant moms, also they have a line to keep ladies feeling fresh during that time of the month – which let’s face it ladies – we all need whether we are peeing in our pants or not.
Plus they are plugging the new line with this slogan:
“Kate is that best friend you call in a crisis, the one who rushes to your side with chocolate.”
I mean … it’s like I am the panties.
Is that not what “Dear Kate” (the advice column) is all about? A friendly ear and voice to rush to your aid when you need it most?
So it got me to thinking — is there a partnership in this pee-panties thing? Could we join forces and be the most helpful, most protective Kate force that ever lived?!?!
Maybe. Or maybe not.
Dear Kate is a column that runs on Kate-book.com every other Thursday at noon. It is written by the wise Katharine Luckinbill, who you should follow on Twitter. Got a life, friendship, family, dating, or relationship question that you’d like Dear Kate to answer? Send it to firstname.lastname@example.org and she will help you out!